Monday, April 19, 2010

How to Meet Your Spouse’s Needs in Marriage

Your response, initiative and connection to your spouse are crucial to the health of your marriage and family. Your expression of your unconditional love and acceptance is the very force that will drive you together in the midst of the testing times in your marriage.

At times this means putting down your own needs in order to meet that of your partner. It means resisting your tendency to be selfish and self protective. If you love unconditionally especially when face with challenges in your marriage, both of you will grow to become more intimate. If you don’t you both will be fighting for supremacy and on the long run anger, hate and resentment will be the bedrock of your marriage.

Your spouse desperately needs to know that you accept him/her no matter what. Even when your spouse makes poor decisions, your love is a make or break reality. Your inability to love will tear your marriage apart while your unconditional love and acceptance will build and strengthen your marriage.

Both you and your spouse need to daily clear away your misunderstandings before going to bed. T his enables you to start the day with a clean slate void of resentments. This process involves a measure of work and commitment from both of you, because communication is essential at this point. This is easier said than done because when a partner feels cheated they tend to either burst out in anger or bury their feelings in resentment. These attitudes are communication killers in a marriage.

Whether you are in the midst of a crisis, living with an ongoing circumstance or just responding to the normal routine of marriage, giving your spouse the security of an unwavering love requires that you grace for their weaknesses, affirming them whenever you can. Help you spouse feel safe, take time to connect and study your spouse, because on the long run you are doing it to ensure your own happiness and fulfillment.

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